Charger Wanted! Fluent Honk Speaker a Plus

You're waiting for the bus, and off in the distance you hear the honking before it even comes into sight. As the yellow tin can/toyota minibus/stagecoach (take your pick) comes to a tooth rattling halt(more of a pause) and you try to decide if it's the one you want, a gentleman jumps off, grabs your bag and throws it on board and scoops you up as the bus starts to pick up speed. He barely gets on behind you. As you barrel down the road, he determines where you want to stop, collects your fare, and returns to lean out the door to nab his next customer. The bus never completely stopped during this process, mind you.

This is the infamous "Cobrador", the "Charger"(more of a human revolving door), and it is one of the exciting and adventurous jobs available to you in lovely Central America.

It's entertaining enough to keep you captivated for an hours-long bus ride, and Emily and I came up with the job description as we rode (it was an eight hour ride, we had plenty of time) -

Energetic and sociable person wanted as a Charger on the Tegucigalpa-to-Managua Bus Route

-Must be excellent at handling money and people of all sizes
-Photographic memory for tracking paying and non paying customers
-Rapid sales skills helpful for convincing people to ride your bus
-Balance and timing critical for last minute grabs
-Former experience as an auctioneer with a quick tongue optional
-Fluent "honk" speaker a plus

"Honk" with its many dialects is an unofficial language here spoken universally by bus drivers and commonly by others operating motor vehicles. There are different honks for letting people know you are coming, honks for people who are in the road about to get smashed, a different honk for a bicycle in the road, honks for other buses that the driver knows, honks to thank local police for waving them through checkpoints, and honks when you nod off on the steering wheel. Several people have enhanced their vehicles (especially taxis) so that honks can have intonation and charater. As non-speakers, one night we were sure that R2-D2 was about to run us down. If you do speak honk, than you have an edge on the other would-be Charger applicants.

While we're on the topic of buses, it's important that you understand how they work in CA, or Central America. (It's even more important not to confuse it with California, though it was fun to think there were hundreds of other Americans on the road for the first couple weeks of our trip before we figured it out). Our eight hour bus ride from Tegucigalpa, Honduras to Managua, Nicaragua only covered the distance of about four football fields. However, we covered about 400 nautical miles of lateral movement through switchbacks over mountains and around pedestrians, cows and cyclists. Ugh.

One more mental picture of public transportation and we're done. Honduras has just purchased one of the nicest high-speed ferries we've ever seen for travel between the mainland and the Bay Islands. Big picture movie screen, brand new chairs, ICE COLD air conditioning - the works. WAY nicer than any ferry we've ever seen in the US, hands down. However - when you arrive, they keep you behind a fence like an animal with your luggage mere feet from your grasping hands, while people press up against it to try and collect luggage like it all might disappear before their very eyes. You don't get your own luggage, you wait for one of a couple people to hear you yelling, pick it up, bring it to you and check your luggage tag. It was like being at an auction and a traffic accident all at once. People in the front who didn't see their bags wouldn't move to let people in, once they got them they couldn't get out. It was mayhem, and really funny unless it took you 45 minutes to get yours. You should probably know, as an important aside to information about the Honduran Bay Islands, that there are hundreds of suicidal crabs that come out in droves at night and litter the streets to play chicken with the taxis. And they, of course, require a different honk.

Sorry for the diatribe on Central American public transportation, but it's a critical factor in understanding the place.

On a more personal note, we're enjoying Granada, Nicaragua today. We've explored the beautiful colonial town, wandered its cathedrals, walked the waterfront of Lake Nicaragua and took a boat through some of its 350 volcanic islands. We then relaxed in the city's lively Parque Central in the shadow of the largest church and had a giant glass of refreshing fresh squeezed juice and...fried pork skins. They were a "must-try" but I think we each only had one. Finally a local pizza place, a couple of beers and had an ice cream cone to finish the day off. It has been great. (and we just learned how to say that last sentence, that very tense in Spanish last week)

As always, if you really want to understand Central America you should come down and visit us. When you do, take the bus - it's an experience.